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Hey, hey, hey.

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This is Lynda again from Rooted&Real.

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We're going to start a new episode (miniseries),
and there'll be five of them.

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It's some truths about marriage.

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Feel free to correct me,
but these are my opinions.

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So, the first one that we're going to do is:

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Love is not enough.

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So let's tell some
truths about marriage.

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The truth that nobody told us
at the wedding or thereafter.

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Everyone told us, "As long as you
love each other, you'd be fine."

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It is a lie.

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Love is important, and love is beautiful.

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But love is not enough.

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I know couples who love each other
so deeply, but they still broke up.

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Why?

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Because love doesn't teach you how
to communicate when you're angry.

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Love doesn't pay rent.

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Love doesn't know how
to apologise properly.

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Love doesn't know how to handle your
mother-in-law, your in-laws,

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the rest, your trauma, your bad days.

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Love is It's truly the spark.

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But marriage needs skills.

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Okay, think about it like a house.

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Love is a beautiful plot of land.

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Everyone is excited about the land.

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"Wow! What a view."

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But you can't live on land.

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You need bricks, you need
plumbing, you need a roof.

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Some
values, like respect is a brick,

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patience is a brick, tolerance is
a brick, self-control is a brick.

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Patience is a break.
Tolerance is a break.

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Self control is a break.
"I'm sorry I was wrong."

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That's a whole wall.

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"How can I help you today?"

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That's the roof.

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Without those,
your love land will just be an empty

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beautiful place where two
people are cold and arguing.

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The truth is, in marriage,
you will have days you don't feel love.

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You will look at them and think,
"I don't even like you right now."

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You know what?
That's normal.

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What keeps you in those
moments is not butterflies.

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It is commitment.

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It is friendship.

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It is, "I choose this person, and I
will choose them even when it's hard."

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If you're dating,
stop asking only, "Do I love them?"

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Start asking,
"Can I solve problems with them?"

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"Can I be bored with them?"

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"Can we fight and still respect each other?"

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"Do they keep their promises
when no one is watching?"

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And if you're already married
and you're thinking, "But I love them,

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why is this still so hard?"

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It's hard because love
was only chapter one.

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Now you're in chapter two
where you build the skills.

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Love got you to the altar.

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Skills will keep you in the house.

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So tomorrow, we talk about the second

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truth, why you will marry a stranger

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again and again in the same marriage.

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So please keep reaching out
on YouTube or on Instagram,

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TikTok, on Lynda: Rooted&Real (@LyndaRootedNReal).

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See you then.